Dear Homeschool Dad,
Your wife . . . she’s exhausted. Homeschooling, housekeeping, shopping, cooking, running errands, all of those extra activities the kids are involved in during the week . . . while worth every ounce of effort, they are wearing her down.
How do I know? Because I’m a homeschool mom, too, and I am weary and exhausted myself.
I want you to know how much your wife appreciates you. She respects you tremendously for all you do to provide for your family. She loves how you love her and your children. She is proud of the husband and father you are. She is grateful for you. Very grateful. That’s why she doesn’t complain much. She has too much admiration for you to make you feel bad for how weary she has grown.
But she has. And she needs just a little bit of extra attention now and then. Some spoiling, if you will. It won’t take much. She’s not expecting it at all. But if you listen to what I’m about to say, she will thank you. And she will feel even more special. And you want that, right?
So here goes, a short list — a few simple things — you can do to let your wife know how much you appreciate all that she does for your family.
1. Say thank you. A lot. Thank her for dinner. Thank her for that lunch she packed for you. Thank her for all the time she spends planning, teaching, and nurturing your kids.
2. Ask questions about her day. Ask her how homeschooling went. Ask her how she’s feeling. Ask her if she needs anything. It doesn’t really matter what you ask, as long it’s nothing akin to, “what did you do all day?”
3. Surprise her with her favorite treat. Bring it home. On a not particularly special day (ie: not Valentine’s Day, her birthday, Mother’s Day, or your anniversary). Wednesday is good. If you’re not sure of her favorite treat, ask one of the kids. They probably know. And if they don’t, you’re probably safe with chocolate. But make it the good kind. Godiva is good. Hershey is not as good. Dove is a safe alternative.
4. Give her a break. For a day. For an afternoon. Even for an hour, if that’s all you can manage. An uninterrupted, hot bath would be wonderful treat for her. You could even surprise her by drawing the bath, lighting the candles, and then taking the kids out for ice cream.
5. Plan a date and arrange the babysitter so she doesn’t have to.
6. Choose a subject you are good at or interested in and teach it to your children. Even if you have to do it on a Saturday. This will let her know that you are in partnership with her in homeschooling. If this isn’t possible, then maybe you could just help someone with math. Math tends to be the most frustrating subject for most homeschool moms.
7. Take a day off and take the whole family on an educational field trip. She’s likely been doing this herself for years. Having you there brings a brand new perspective. And your kids will love it. Making your kids happy will make your wife happy.
8. Let her sleep in on Saturday morning. Make breakfast with the kids and then keep them busy with a game or other (quiet) activity. Once in awhile, help the kids make breakfast for her and serve it to her in bed.
9. Participate in curriculum choices, especially if she asks. There’s so much to choose from and she really wants to know what you think. Have an opinion and share it with her.
10. Try not to complain when she chooses a curriculum that doesn’t work well, sells it, and buys something else. Or when she buys books. Just smile and buy another book shelf. You’re a homeschool family, it’s inevitable that your house will begin to look like the Library of Congress. It’s ok. Really, it is. Just pick a book and begin reading aloud to your family. Your wife is sacrificing so much to teach your kids. A few books are a small price to pay.
A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. {Proverbs 31:10}
There are probably a few other things you can think of on your own, but this will get you started. More than anything, just let her know you appreciate her, love her, and that you know it’s hard. That’s all she really needs.
Thank you,
A Homeschool Mom